I have seen/ heard/ read a lot of posts/ tweets/ comments about people telling their IRL (in real life) friends about their blogs. And I pretty much have always weighed in on it. I decided to just write a post of my own about it and share my thoughts. Also it's long sooo maybe now is a good time for your 15 minute break at work.
A lot of bloggers started out on this venture without telling their IRL people. Not family, friends or significant others. So after you establish your bloggy self it’s hard to share it with any one besides your BL (blogland) friends. Not because you’re a different person (although you may be) but more because the relative anonymity is refreshing. You can say what you want! But you will always have haters. If they are internet-only haters, it only matters a tiny bit. If people you know IRL and worse, people who matter IRL hate your blog then what?
WELP. I had a blog that I started a year ago. It was a fashion blog. It wasn’t the right fit. That is already something only bloggers will really understand. But I didn’t make an effort to connect with other bloggers. I only shared my blog with IRL people. I didn’t realize there was a whole bloggy world of people who were friendly and awesome and interesting.
I shared my posts on my personal facebook page and was getting around 30ish page views on the days I posted. (not too often) I wasn’t really getting much feedback tho. No comments, no “likes” (besides my always supportive boyfriend). There were some people- (ERW, I'm looking at you!) that always said something positive when I saw them. But I wasn’t really having fun with it- it had already become a homework assignment and since I wasn’t seeing/feeling a real pay off, I was kinda over it. I stopped blogging.
I did miss it, I didn't like blogging the way I knew it but then I started reading more people's blogs. I thought about starting things up again but never followed thru. Then it happened, I went to visit my girlfriend and her and her friends were like “we love your blog! We’re so sad you stopped posting!” I’m like mmmm saywhaa? But they had been following along the whole time. I had a few more encounters similar to that. Then people started being like “you should start up your blog again!” I was like oh, people read the shit I write about? who knew?
I decided to come back to blogging but take a different route. That’s when Dog Hair Is An Accessory: A lifestyle blog was born. The first post went live, and again I shared it on my personal fb page. At that point I didn’t know people DIDN’T share posts on their personal pages.
I got an overwhelmingly positive response. Friends, family and even people I hadn’t talked to in years were “liking” and reading my blog! I had friends share my posts and they had comments from people I didn't even know and with only great things. Is this real life?
Since then, my blog has come a long way and I’ve come a long way as a blogger (in only 3 months!) Still tho, my friends and family read my blog practically daily and often bring it up in conversation! It’s crazy, and strange and it sometimes worries me but I’m just being me. My bloggy self and IRL self are completely the same person so I guess the IRL people who judge my blog were prob already judging me anyway.
Tom, forever my biggest fan, is awesome. He shares my posts, “likes” them, talks to me about them and of course is always on the look out for spelling errors. He knows I enjoy it and is genuinely interested in all of it. But he doesn’t reallllllly get it. Not that it’s his fault.
One thing I can definitely tell you from experience- if your IRL friends don’t blog, they won’t get it. There are a lot of people (I was one of them) that read blogs without having a blog of their own. Those people will understand a bit better but again, from experience, I’m telling you it isn’t the same.
Most people (from what I can tell) worry about IRL people judging them. That will happen. It's ok. Some people in BL will judge you too. People judge people. The important people won't judge you tho.
Even my best friend didn’t “get it." She never really made an effort to read or talk about it. That sucked. But it wasn’t until I started making bloggy friends and I made a clear effort to tell her about all of it that I realized she just had no idea what the whole bloggy deal was about. And once she did, she was wayy more supportive! (Tanks HP)
Things non-bloggy people don’t “get”:
- Link ups
- Buttons
- Sponsoring
- Answering a million comment emails
- Bloggy friendships
- Bloggy awards
- Blog design
- My need to know HTML
- Picmonkey/pixlr
- Bloglovin
- Social media obsessions/ the amount of retweeting
- Documenting things “for a post”
- Blates
- GCF
- Blogger’s little “quirks” that really ruin the way your post/blog looks
- Blog stereotypes (mommy bloggers, fashion bloggers, lifestyle bloggers, DIY bloggers etc.)
There are probably more but even if IRL people understand the concept of these things, they don’t “GET” it if they don’t blog. That’s why it’s hard. It doesn't mean tho, that they won't support you and read along!
Here’s why I'm glad I shared:
- Unwavering support from Tom
- Tom’s mom and aunt asked for the URL because everyone else in the family reads it
- People sharing things I’ve posted
- People I didn’t realize read or even knew about my blog, mention things I’ve talked about in it
- Tom and HP getting REALLY excited for me when they heard I was nominated for the Liebster (Tom told me he hoped I win. So cute.)
- Friends I don’t talk to regularly stay updated on my crazy life
- People telling me, “you managed to write exactly the way you speak and it’s SO amazing” (direct quote!)
- When people I don’t know “like” or comment on a post another friend has shared
- Feeling proud about something I care about and sharing it with people who care about me
- When non- blogger people comment on my posts
There is a lot to consider. Once you start sharing you can’t take it back. But personally, I have found sharing has been a great thing.
I know a lot of people post about things they woudn’t want people they know IRL to know. And I understand that. I don’t think sharing is the “right” way to go about it. It’s just the right way for me.
So to all my IRL people- THANK YOU! You reading, commenting, "liking," and talking about my blog warms my heart! (SUPER SAPPY) Your support means more than I can say. I'm in love with this and I'm so glad that those of you pushing me to continue are around. Also, if you have a gmail account you can comment!!
To my BL friends- You guys are the reason I'm sticking around and that I'm as active in blogland as I am. I've met incredible people and been inspired by so many of you! Whether you tell your IRL friends or not, I'm glad I know about your blogs!!
linked up with Lisette, Tori, and Facebook Frenzy
