Telling IRL Peeps About Le Blog


I have seen/ heard/ read a lot of posts/ tweets/ comments about people telling their IRL (in real life) friends about their blogs. And I pretty much have always weighed in on it. I decided to just write a post of my own about it and share my thoughts. Also it's long sooo maybe now is a good time for your 15 minute break at work.

A lot of bloggers started out on this venture without telling their IRL people. Not family, friends or significant others. So after you establish your bloggy self it’s hard to share it with any one besides your BL (blogland) friends. Not because you’re a different person (although you may be) but more because the relative anonymity is refreshing. You can say what you want! But you will always have haters. If they are internet-only haters, it only matters a tiny bit. If people you know IRL and worse, people who matter IRL hate your blog then what?

WELP. I had a blog that I started a year ago. It was a fashion blog. It wasn’t the right fit. That is already something only bloggers will really understand. But I didn’t make an effort to connect with other bloggers. I only shared my blog with IRL people. I didn’t realize there was a whole bloggy world of people who were friendly and awesome and interesting.

I shared my posts on my personal facebook page and was getting around 30ish page views on the days I posted. (not too often) I wasn’t really getting much feedback tho. No comments, no “likes” (besides my always supportive boyfriend). There were some people- (ERW, I'm looking at you!) that always said something positive when I saw them. But I wasn’t really having fun with it- it had already become a homework assignment and since I wasn’t seeing/feeling a real pay off, I was kinda over it. I stopped blogging.

I did miss it, I didn't like blogging the way I knew it but then I started reading more people's blogs. I thought about starting things up again but never followed thru. Then it happened, I went to visit my girlfriend and her and her friends were like “we love your blog! We’re so sad you stopped posting!” I’m like mmmm saywhaa? But they had been following along the whole time. I had a few more encounters similar to that. Then people started being like “you should start up your blog again!” I was like oh, people read the shit I write about? who knew?

I decided to come back to blogging but take a different route. That’s when Dog Hair Is An Accessory: A lifestyle blog was born. The first post went live, and again I shared it on my personal fb page. At that point I didn’t know people DIDN’T share posts on their personal pages.

I got an overwhelmingly positive response. Friends, family and even people I hadn’t talked to in years were “liking” and reading my blog! I had friends share my posts and they had comments from people I didn't even know and with only great things. Is this real life?

Since then, my blog has come a long way and I’ve come a long way as a blogger (in only 3 months!) Still tho, my friends and family read my blog practically daily and often bring it up in conversation! It’s crazy, and strange and it sometimes worries me but I’m just being me. My bloggy self and IRL self are completely the same person so I guess the IRL people who judge my blog were prob already judging me anyway.

Tom, forever my biggest fan, is awesome. He shares my posts, “likes” them, talks to me about them and of course is always on the look out for spelling errors. He knows I enjoy it and is genuinely interested in all of it. But he doesn’t reallllllly get it. Not that it’s his fault.

One thing I can definitely tell you from experience- if your IRL friends don’t blog, they won’t get it. There are a lot of people (I was one of them) that read blogs without having a blog of their own. Those people will understand a bit better but again, from experience, I’m telling you it isn’t the same.

Most people (from what I can tell) worry about IRL people judging them. That will happen. It's ok. Some people in BL will judge you too. People judge people. The important people won't judge you tho. 

Even my best friend didn’t “get it." She never really made an effort to read or talk about it. That sucked. But it wasn’t until I started making bloggy friends and I made a clear effort to tell her about all of it that I realized she just had no idea what the whole bloggy deal was about. And once she did, she was wayy more supportive! (Tanks HP)

Things non-bloggy people don’t “get”: 

  • Link ups
  • Buttons
  • Sponsoring
  • Answering a million comment emails
  • Bloggy friendships
  • Bloggy awards
  • Blog design
  • My need to know HTML
  • Picmonkey/pixlr
  • Bloglovin
  • Social media obsessions/ the amount of retweeting
  • Documenting things “for a post”
  • Blates
  • GCF
  • Blogger’s little “quirks” that really ruin the way your post/blog looks
  • Blog stereotypes (mommy bloggers, fashion bloggers, lifestyle bloggers, DIY bloggers etc.)

There are probably more but even if IRL people understand the concept of these things, they don’t “GET” it if they don’t blog. That’s why it’s hard. It doesn't mean tho, that they won't support you and read along!

Here’s why I'm glad I shared:

  • Unwavering support from Tom
  • Tom’s mom and aunt asked for the URL because everyone else in the family reads it
  • People sharing things I’ve posted
  • People I didn’t realize read or even knew about my blog, mention things I’ve talked about in it
  • Tom and HP getting REALLY excited for me when they heard I was nominated for the Liebster (Tom told me he hoped I win. So cute.)
  • Friends I don’t talk to regularly stay updated on my crazy life
  • People telling me, “you managed to write exactly the way you speak and it’s SO amazing” (direct quote!)
  • When people I don’t know “like” or comment on a post another friend has shared
  • Feeling proud about something I care about and sharing it with people who care about me
  • When non- blogger people comment on my posts

There is a lot to consider. Once you start sharing you can’t take it back. But personally, I have found sharing has been a great thing.

I know a lot of people post about things they woudn’t want people they know IRL to know. And I understand that. I don’t think sharing is the “right” way to go about it. It’s just the right way for me.

So to all my IRL people- THANK YOU! You reading, commenting, "liking," and talking about my blog warms my heart! (SUPER SAPPY) Your support means more than I can say. I'm in love with this and I'm so glad that those of you pushing me to continue are around. Also, if you have a gmail account you can comment!!

To my BL friends- You guys are the reason I'm sticking around and that I'm as active in blogland as I am. I've met incredible people and been inspired by so many of you! Whether you tell your IRL friends or not, I'm glad I know about your blogs!!


linked up with Lisette, Tori, and Facebook Frenzy

18 comments:

  1. I love this post because I only started blogging in march and had no intention of telling anyone I knew. It took me 2 months to tell my boyfriend that I live with that I had a blog.. And I only told him bc it felt like I was keeping something from him! I've now told my 5 closest girlfriends but that's it. I'm way too scared to share it on twitter or on Facebook because of all the judging that goes on. You might make me want to share it! At least to my family and close friends

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  2. I am in love with all the words you wrote . I don't share my blog with IRL people because I don't want to be judged by them . I am so happy around my BL friends :)
    Got you from The Collective .I invite you to join my blog hop Grab A Friend
    Noor @ Noor's Place

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  3. I love this! Don't worry...you will learn all of that stuff as your blog. If you need any help or advice in the blogging world..just let me know!

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  4. I told close friends about my blog, but didn't want it to escape to high school frenemies- you'd think 12 years later I wouldn't care! But this is so true "so I guess the IRL people who judge my blog were prob already judging me anyway" so maybe I should just share away on my personal page....

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  5. only 4 people know about my blog in real life! Dyllon is my biggest supporter... its funny but I am totally okay with people IRL not knowing.. because im way to obsessed with my bloggy friends anyway!

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  6. I love everything about this. My real life friends read my blog about once a month. The thing is - you have to do it for yourself, it's just a bonus when people seem to actually be interested. Also, that GIF at the end made my day.

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  7. I blogged for over a year strictly via my personal facebook page before interacting with other bloggers. Everyone knows about and talks to me about it. I actually didn't know that people DIDN'T share their blogs with people they knew.

    Since so many of my readers are non bloggers and like the fact that I appeal to the masses, per se, I don't talk about things that only blog people would get on my blog - I save that for emails or twitter even, but not the actual blog. They don't get that they can follow via GFC or bloglovin', they think they follow me by clicking on the link I post on FB. And that's fine with me.

    It also helps that I don't give one shit what people think about me. That's their business, not mine. And most shit talking comes from a place of jealousy. Also their problem, not mine.

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  8. Love bloggy friends :)

    andI love the lunch table scenario! I will raise my hand to the lifestyle blogger!

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  9. oh hey blog friend! i am glad i finally took the plunge and started commenting on other blogs and participating in links up, because it lead me to this blog! (well technically you came to mine first, but who's keeping track) for the longest time i was only doing the fb route and was only getting feedback from my aunts, my gma, and my mom...because yes, they all have fb too.

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  10. all these GIFS are soo funny! I totally understand! My guy is always correcting my spelling errors too!

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  11. What a great post! I've always been nervous to tell IRL people about my blog, and I really think it's all Barney Stinson's fault haha. Please tell me you watch HIMYM and get that reference? Everyone in his group hates his blog and that makes all blogs look bad ;)

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  12. i post my blog on my personal facebook when I have a post I am super proud of or think is really funny. only the people who support and love you will read them and follow you...it is a win win if you ask me.

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  13. That's great that you love this blog so much! I do too! I've had blogs in the past too that I didn't tell too many people about. I still don't really mention it and always get surprised when someone mentions my blog to me IRL!

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  14. I wish I could share my blog with more IRL friends and family, but I'm too scurrrred. Haha. My blog is my little place to say whatever the hell I want and I don't know if I'd do that if my grandparents were reading. But maybe someday I'll tell them. ;)

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  15. I have the same thing - I just feel self conscious about telling people I know about my blog, but I started it by the pushing of an IRL friend. Who knows?

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  16. This could have been written by me - I feel the same way! For a while, I was using my blog as an outlet because I was going through a rough time. I didn't realize that my family knew about it, read it, and were deeply concerned about me. But no one ever commented on the blog or actually reached out. (I did have about 75-150 readers per post, still don't know where they came from)

    Now, I'm slowly working my way up in followers, but it's all about quality, not quantity. There are some blogs I LOVE who don't follow me, but seeing that they have a new entry makes my whole day. I just love the blogging community and I'm so glad I found it (and you!) :)

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  17. I just started a blog, and like you I pretty much wear my heart on my sleeve! I went ahead and posted on facebook, even though I was kind of nervous about what people I know would think about me. It's hard working up the courage to put your life out there for teh world to see! Unfortunately though, not many of my IRL seem to be following me, so I'm hoping to make BL friends :)

    Looking forward to exploring your blog!

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  18. A few people in real life know about my blog, but honestly I wish that they didn't. The fact that they read it makes me think about what I post sometimes, when all I want to do is be completely anonymous. Love your story though!
    thecaliforniacollegestudent.com

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