Dating Trump Cards

Tom's friend, Carter (who I've mentioned has this music blog) and his girlfriend, B came into town a little while back and we went to din near our apt. During din the topic of ex girlfriends came up. It was mentioned that Tom's ex would be at L&J's wedding and that I was kinda absolutely freaking out. B was like, "No it's cool. Just find the one thing that makes her lose." I'm like mm ok.. so then we brianstormed for a little and during that time, dubbed this feel-better fact The Dating Trump Card. After that it doesn't matter what the ex has, has done, or who they are because you win.

Now, there are "baby trump cards" and then there is The Ultimate Trump Card. Trump cards are different for every ex. So you have to know a little about them when they were dating your guy and their current sitch. I'm not saying stalk them (if you want to go right ahead) but a little info goes a long way. Also this is one time that it's ok to be petty. You aren't using these to throw at the bitch lady, you're just thinking of these things to help you get through the experience.

Here's how they work.

Baby Trump Card
These are named "baby" because they're smaller and not as intimidating. See also: Baby Crushes (ya'll must know what those are but I'll prob make that another post) These are things like the following-

-the ex is dating someone
-the ex has a drug habit
-you're more successful
-his family doesn't like her
-his family adores you
-you're a bridesmaid in his sisters wedding (yea that one really helps)
-the ex lives far away
-they dated a long time ago
-HE ended things
-she cheated on him

Ultimate Trump Card
For this, it's gonna be super different for everyone. The Ultimate Trump Card for one ex may not even be valid for another so they are on an indivdual basis. For example living together could be considered the Ultimate Trump Card for some people but that wasn't good enough to make me feel better. Mine was Lil. Kindaaaa like having a kid. We have Lil and I am most certainly her momma. We share responsibility with everything about her and she loves me. Lil is OUR dog. It's a much stronger tie than living together (I think) and no one could EVER compare to Lil's mom. aka me. So here are some other Ultimate Trump Cards-

-you live together
-the ex lives with their current significant other
-the ex is engaged/married
-you're engaged/married
-you co-own a dog
-you're a lot better looking
-the ex had plastic surgery and looks like MJ
-the ex has a kid/kids
-you have a kid/kids

So next time you have to be in a situation that you have to spend time with, or meet an ex- look up this post, call your BFF (for me that was Sara and HP) and stack your deck with as many trump cards as y'all come up with. You'll feel better.

Also.. you should probably just ask your guy to ignore the ex. It will be easier on everyone that way.. Trust me.

Tom and I, in love, at the wedding

What are your trump cards?