Lil: the Inconvenient Pedestrian

I know in my last post I said I would write about the wine trail but I didn't write that post today, I wrote this one and when I got home I cooked (it was actually successful) and then I was at happy hour until now (Salute in downtown Hartford has an amazing all night happy hour) so I will post about it tomorrow. For real. I told you I wasn't good at this and the fact I've been posting everyday is a complete miracle. So for now you can read about my incredibly outrageous dog.

I’ve already written one post about how awkward Lil is. But here’s another one. I hope you enjoy them because she’s REAL awkward so I have a lot of material to write about.

I’m gonna tell you about her new favorite thing to do on walks. As I talked about in Our Dog the Mental Case, she gets super weird and wary around strangers. Most of the time. Here’s the issue: she’s also incrediblyyyy nosey. So she wants people to stay away from her but she also wants to find out what everyone’s deal is.

This is what I’ve found: When people are overly friendly and/or stupid they’ll stop and shove their hand in Lil’s face. Bad idea. She gets super cranky and makes this weird face that is very similar to the dramatic chipmunk face. (Google it.) When people are indifferent and just walk by, Lil sometimes freaks out and acts like they snuck up on her but usually she just lets it go. Now for the issue- when people are kinda afraid of her but brave the sidewalk we’re on, I’m pretty sure she senses their fear. What does she do? Attack? Growl? Hide behind me? Try and get out of the way? No. She stands in the middle of the sidewalk. And she will. not. move. I try and pull her to the side of the path or out onto the street but shes like, “nah mom. I was here first. Let’s see how this elderly lady reacts to me just standing here looking at her.”  So now this poor person is having a stare down as they walk down the street. (This morning it was a tiny old lady who looked upset that there was anyone on the sidewalk let alone this sketchy dog) The people that have had to deal with this situation so far typically walk really slow until they’re very close and the person walks by super quick and takes a wide path around my creeper dog. I always mutter an “I’m sorry.. ugh god damn it Lil.”

Here’s the best part- as soon as the person is level with Lil, she sticks out her nose at the person and follows them with her head as they walk by. This typically makes the person kind of jump/run the next few steps while Lil is trying to continue her sniffing. During all of this I’m yankingggg her to the other side of the sidewalk but she’s completely planted. After the person is too far away to sniff she goes back on her merry way. Meanwhile I’m the person who has the awkward, pain in the ass dog that everyone who has a brain will completely avoid.

I can't really capture her in action on the street but I hope this helps you get an acurately awkward picture of Lil. She was tired. SO tired she coudn't drag her back end off the couch. She stayed like that for about 10 minutes while I packed lunch this morning. EMBARRASSING. She's looking at me like "Mom could you help? Look at the situatuion I'm in!" No Lil. You can handle it.

You know, I swear she picked up on Tom’s incredible skill of doing the most obnoxious thing to bug me in the worst situation. (maybe she gets it from me.. no, I never would do that..) (Also, yes, I do think that our dog inherited traits from us even tho we aren’t her birth parents. NATURE vs NURTURE PEOPLE!) Anyway, it’s miserable. And I hope this is a phase. Also I think we need to move to the country and never have her interact with anyone.

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